You were never going to turn your back on your elderly mother. After your father passed away, or perhaps she’s been living alone for more years than you can remember, but you always determined that you would be there for her. Living in the same town has made it easy, but being a family caregiver is stressful.
Most people have no idea just how stressful it can and often becomes (being a family caregiver) until they do that type of work firsthand. They think it is just something they add to their day, perhaps once or twice a week to stop over their elderly mother’s house, for example, to check in on her, bring her some groceries, maybe make a quick trip to the pharmacy, and so forth.
The reality is much different. For most people, it starts out once in a while, but eventually increases and, once it increases, it usually does so rapidly. What you thought would be once a week suddenly becomes four times a week, maybe multiple times a day, or even every day of the week.
On top of all that, you often worry more and more about your mother’s safety, her ability to clean the house, go outside and do things she wants, and since you are sacrificing so much for her, you think it is reasonable to request that she take it easy, rest, and avoid putting herself in potentially harmful situations.
Yet, she wants to live life on her terms. Quality of life still matters to her, as it should. So, what’s the solution? When you two begin snapping at one another, when the tension is building in your relationship, it’s high time to discuss the prospect of assisted living.
What if your mother has already dismissed assisted living as an option?
Assisted Living Fairhope, AL: Respite Support at Assisted Living
The key question to ask yourself is whether or not she understands what it is, what it offers, and what options are available. Most people have misconceptions about what assisted living is. They assume it’s a permanent or long-term solution to what they might feel is a short-term problem.
Maybe your mother is getting stronger. Perhaps she had a medical emergency and is in recovery still. That doesn’t stop the tension building in your relationship with her.
Did you know that assisted living may offer respite services? That means your mother might be able to go to an assisted living facility in the area for a short time, maybe even for just a few days a week. Some assisted living communities might even offer overnight stay options for some seniors.
That could be exactly what both of you need right now. Not a full-time, long-term commitment, but something that gives you both a much-needed break, not just from the rigors of daily life that have taken over everything, but from each other.
Contact a quality assisted living facility nearby and find out what respite options they offer to seniors in their community.
About Cindy Johnson
Follow Us!