There Are Generally Three KEY Reasons Seniors Don’t Want to Discuss Assisted Living

Tom was having the most difficult time discussing assisted living with his 82-year-old father. Widowed and having lived alone for more than three years, Tom’s father was really showing signs of struggling lately. Tom began spending more and more of his free time stopping by to help out, check on him, and it was getting frustrating. Tom never planned on becoming a full-time caregiver, and he simply didn’t want this to continue.

“I just want him to be safe,” he confided in his wife one evening. That’s when she mentioned assisted living.
When Tom began talking about assisted living, his father dismissed it out right. “I’m not going to an old folks’ home,” is basically what he said. This frustrated time and it began a pattern of animosity and even hostility between the two in the weeks and months that followed.

What Tom didn’t understand was there could be numerous reasons seniors don’t want to discuss assisted living. Some of them can be legitimate and others can seem to be completely fabricated or unreasonable. Below are three common reasons why some aging men and women just don’t want to talk about this important topic.

One. They deny their own abilities (or inabilities).

Assisted Living Pascagoula, AL: Why Seniors Don’t Want to Discuss Assisted Living

As you’ve gotten older, how quickly have you come to the realization you simply can’t do the same things you were able to in your 20s or 30s? Most of us have a difficult time with reality in this respect. Even somebody in their 70s or 80s may still feel like they can do the things that were easy in their 50s or 60s, though they simply can’t.

Until a person accepts the new reality in which they live, it might be difficult to talk about an important topic such as assisted living.

Two. Misconceptions.
There are numerous misconceptions about assisted living out there. Far too many people immediately associate this type of facility with a nursing home. The two are completely different at assisted living actually offers a higher quality of life for many of its residents then living in their own apartment or house by themselves.

Three. Concerns about the cost.
Nursing home care is more expensive than assisted living, on average. However, many seniors and even their families simply assume assisted living is too costly to even consider. In truth, when the benefits, safety, activities, and even dining options are calculated in, assisted living is a reasonable option for many seniors.

If Tom had understood these key issues, he may have had an easier time discussing assisted living with his aging father.


If you or an aging loved one are considering Assisted Living Pascagoula, AL, contact Ashbury Manor Specialty Care and Assisted Living at 251-317-3017.

About Cindy Johnson

Ashbury Manor’s Administrator since 2008, Cindy Johnson is a long-time expert in the assisted living field. Prior to her arrival at Ashbury Manor, Cindy managed acquisitions and crisis management for existing and new larger senior care project developments for eleven years. As regional manager for an Oregon-based assisted living management company, Cindy was directly responsible for operations for five 50-65 bed assisted living facilities. As manager during the transition to new ownership, Cindy reorganized internal operations and conducted leadership training for Executive Directors. As a result of her management and expertise, one of the company’s facilities (in Ocala, Florida) received a deficiency-free survey, resulting in the lifting of a moratorium on operation.

A nurse for 36 years, senior care has always been Cindy’s passion. Desiring to work more closely with residents, Cindy became a Category II Administrator in 2005. As Ashbury Manor’s Administrator, Cindy understands the complexities associated with dementia and cognitive impairment and she has fallen in love with seniors with dementia or cognitive impairment and their families.

Cindy is Treasurer of the local “Senior Coalition” chapter. She enjoys mentoring new candidates who want to become administrators.

As a 16-bed facility, with Cindy's training and experience, our residents and their families can be sure Ashbury Manor’s carefully selected staff provides the expertise of a larger facility while maintaining the individualized personal care of a small special needs home.
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